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Marriage is not for me!!
aduial_eternal
marriagenot4me
aduial_eternal
Wow, this place is kinda dead. Shame.

Well, one of my former high school friends got married today- well, technically yesterday, since it's midnight already. I wasn't invited, but that's no surprise considering I haven't talked to her in over a year. I wouldn't have gone anyway. I've been to one wedding and that was boring enough, please and thank you.
One of my other friends was invited, and she sent me a link to her photobucket so that I could see some of the pics she had taken. As I was looking through these photos, the only thing I could think was "better her then me". Here it was, one of the happiest days of her life, and that was all I could think.
Bad llama. ^^;

I definately am not marriage material.

Current Location: Home
Current Mood: cheerful cheerful
Current Music: Silence

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aduial_eternal
marriagenot4me
aduial_eternal
So there's this guy that I was friends with back when I was still in high school. He's married now, and has a baby boy. The kid's the reason he got married.
I talked to him a couple hours ago via MSN, and he is MISERABLE. I had to laugh, and asked him if it was anything like what anyone had told him it would be and I got a resounding "no", followed by an "I want to shoot myself".
Reenforced my determination to never get married. It was glorious.

Current Location: Home
Current Mood: amused amused
Current Music: Silence

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marriagenot4me
elliebites
Alternatives to marriage project

Also, if any of you frequate gaiaonline, join my anti-marriage guild

Current Location: Bed
Current Mood: chipper chipper

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browse
marriagenot4me
browse
Here's my introductory post.

My name is browse. I'm a 40-something living in the Pacific Northwet of the US, working as a computer geek, dating, hiking, cooking, doing massage and generally trying to find the right balance in life.

I have firmly decided not to get married, ever. I can enumerate most of my reasons, but I can't promise they will make sense to anyone but me.

I didn't have a lot of great role models for marriage as I was growing up. It seemed like all of the parents of my friends and peers had gotten divorced at least once. My own parents did. And those couples that had stayed together didn't seem like the sort of relationships I wanted to emulate. There wasn't anyone I can think of whose marriage I could point at and say "There! I want something like that! They've got it figured out!"

I've been with the same person over 11 years now, and I hope it lasts for a hell of a lot longer. But I've had enough failed relationships to be wary. "If it's working, don't mess with it!" So far, it's working. I don't feel the need to tempt fate.

Whether marriage changes you or not is a question I will leave, for now. But it is my experience that it changes how other people treat you. Suddenly you go from being an individual to being counted as part of an indivisible, joined-at-the-hip unit. The idea that you and your partner might have different interests, plans, or socialize separately evaporates. That bothers me hugely.

Frankly, I'm enough of a libertarian that I fail to see why the government or, worse yet, some religious institution has any say in my relationship status. Bah! That's between me and my partner. Anyone else who thinks they have a say in the matter can bugger off.

Anyway, that's my story. Thanks to minuet1965 for starting this community!

Current Music: Talk to Her - Piers Faccini

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minuet1965
marriagenot4me
minuet1965
hi

Just thought i would post this because it was a hysterical conversation i had with a guy i was getting to know.

let's just say he let his hair down and i'm soooooooooooooooo glad i had that discussion.

For one fleeting moment, i thought i was CARRIE BRADSHAW from sex in the city.  Where someone is questioning my lifestyle
and calling it BAD

Seriously, this guy said LIVING IN THE CITY was a bad thing.  The fact that I didn't want any kids was a horrible, god cursed thing.
He acted like 'casual sex' was something i did for fun and recreation (which i don't) and i ended the conversation by saying i was not justifying my lifestyle to someone i did NOT know.  that you for enlightening me now i know not to meet you.

what i really wanted to say was, 'now i know why your ex left you after three years' i bet that was some of the reason

i am truly SICK of guys who think you are desperate.
i simply do away with them
i tell them i am extremely picky about who i choose
and continue to be that way

good riddance.
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minuet1965
marriagenot4me
minuet1965
Does anybody else wrestle with the decisions they've made about being single or even childree for that matter?

I used to have a hard time coming to terms with the decision I made but I finally think I'm at peace with it.

I'm probably the most senior member here at 42, single, never married no kids.
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marriagenot4me
mole_goddess
 Hi all!  I guess this is my introductory/rant post.  I think it is really cool that this community was created... I only know one other person in real life (my boyfriend) who shares my views on marriage.  We've been dating for little over 3 and a half years, and we have never felt the need to have a big, creepy ceremony to declare our love.

Also the thought of signing a piece of paper saying we will continue to love each other seems ridiculous to us.  How can you promise you will still love someone one, ten, or eighty years from now?  If we decide our relationship isn't working anymore we don't want to be stuck with a legal obligation to either stay together, bitter and unhappy, or pay buttloads of money to split up.

I am extremely individualistic: I don't believe in binding myself to another person.  I like to be free of obligation, or from being dependent upon someone else.  I think it shows a more "pure" feeling of love when you hang out with someone simply because you enjoy their company, not because you have to due to some sense of duty and long-term commitment.  It also helps to eliminate all those petty feelings of jealousy and insecurity that seem to plague couples.

Somewhat similar to a previous member, I am an atheist, anarchist, childfree, and non-monogomous (in the sense that my bf and I don't restrict sex to within our relationship)... so I have absolutely NO reason to feel I should get married.

Anyway, it's nice to be here among like-minded people!  Sorry about the long lecture :P it's just so relieving to be able to speak frankly about what I think without people freaking out all over the place.
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aduial_eternal
marriagenot4me
aduial_eternal

Howdy, I'm Rachel. Rach works just as well. I'm 20, like in AK.

I've been with this guy for three+ years. My mom and I were having lunch, and over the course of our dicussion we got to talking about my relationship with the guy.

Mom: So, has he asked you to marry him?
Me: ... No...
Mom: Do you want to marry him?
Me: No.
Mom: *confused look* Do you love him?
Me: *SIGH* Yeah Mom, I do. I just don't believe in marriage.
Mom: ... Oh...

So, what? Me not wanting to get married means I don't love my guy? Please. If I didn't love him I wouldn't have stuck around for three years.

Current Location: Home
Current Mood: blah blah
Current Music: Silence

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marriagenot4me
elliebites
I'm 22. I was engaged (lol) from when I was 18 up until earlier this year when I broke up with my fiance. Now I'm glad the wedding never went ahead. I now figure with co-habiting being such the norm now-a-day, marriage is a massive waste of time, energy and most of all MONEY! You spend thousands on the wedding, only to have a 50% chance that you'll be spending thousands on a divorce! At least with a "boyfriend", its not so messy when you split. Also, being both atheist and childfree kinda nulls 2 major reasons for marriage. :)

Bachelorette for life! :D

Current Mood: chipper chipper

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minuet1965
marriagenot4me
minuet1965
do you ever feel like you are the only one who isn't coupled in america??

Now I am sure there are a lot of prefer to be single people out there but i don't know where they are
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